Adriana Kraft

When it's time to heat things up...

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Stay Sexy ~ Just Do Something!

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Note to self: Re-read what I’ve been writing! Every week, I write a column here on our blog with tips for staying vibrant, excited, healthy and sexy across the life cycle. Most mornings, I get up and I start my day with something I’ve been writing about – usually, some stretches and at least ten minutes of target-heartrate activity before breakfast.  But lately? Well, lately, I haven’t felt like it. I’m not motivated. I’m resistant. I’m oppositional. I don’t wanna.

What would I advise someone in my quandary?

Just start. Just do something.

So here’s my pledge: Tomorrow morning, before that first cuppa, I will go stand in the living room and start with the simple opening exercise from my fave Extreme Makeover DVD. All you do is stand in one place and swing your arms, for maybe thirty seconds. Focus on keeping your shoulders down, not scrunched up by your ears, but relaxed. Swing both arms forward, then behind. Feel the tension go, and feel your heart and your body start to wake up, just from that simple beginning.

The thing is, once you’re already moving, it’s much easier to keep moving and ramp up to more active routines.

But I’m not promising to do all that – all I’m pledging to do is to start. We’ll see what happens after that!

Stay Sexy ~ It’s Raining

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It’s raining. It’s been raining most of the last two weeks, plus it’s cold, even for North Iowa. Having spent the winter in the southwest, we’re not used to cold and rain. Our exercise routines are outdoors, as much as possible.

We did have one sunny day, two days ago, when things had dried out enough for us to walk our favorite river trail and see if any ephemerals were in bloom – they were, and here are some pics (Bluebells, Anemone, May Apple). Walks like that feed both body and soul.

But it’s still raining. Our hopes for an afternoon bikeride yesterday between storms were dashed, and both of us are weary of the stationary bike in our basement. Boring. Repetitive. Burdensome.

Enter my husband, about 3pm, into the living room where I was editing. “Let’s dance.” Music to my ears! We spent the next half hour dancing to music from our high school days, laughing, trying new moves, making mistakes, laughing some more – and keeping our heart rates in that magical target zone.

Good for body and soul.

Stay Sexy ~ Behind the scenes at a real swing club!

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We’ve been writing fictional erotic romance adventures about couples who swing for over four years now – today, we thought we’d take our readers behind the scenes for real!

JJ’s Western Swing is a friendly, comfortable on-premise swing club located about an hour west of Las Vegas, in Pahrump, Nevada. Club hosts Jenny and Johnny offer parties in their private home – but don’t be fooled into thinking this is a small venue or that it might cramp your style. Their home is a spacious ranch on two and a half acres, surrounded by a privacy fence. There’s room inside the fence for up to three RV’s (electrical hook-up only), but be sure to make a specific RV reservation if this is an option you’ll need.

Inside the house, you’ll find a dance floor, juke box, a small stage with a stripper pole (and there will always be someone who pole-dances…), two private playrooms, an open playroom with a massage table and various restraint equipment, a full kitchen, buffet and dining area, and a couple smaller gathering spaces, with plenty of seating.

Outside there’s a swimming pool (open in season), a hot tub (usually year-round), a tiki bar, a fire pit, several bungalows for additional play rooms, and again, lots of seating. Towels and bathrobes are available by the hot tub, and also by the massage table. The bungalows have air conditioning and heating, comfortable beds, and space for storing overnight luggage for guests who’ve elected to spend the night.

How to dress? Any way you want! Some party-goers are in street clothes – jeans or shorts, tee-shirt or polo shirt, for example. Others wear sexy club clothes. There are no limits on what you may reveal, and it won’t be long before at least a few people are wearing no clothes at all. Sometimes there’s a theme, such as St. Patrick’s Day, or sexy lingerie, or Halloween. Themes will always be posted on the website.

The party usually gets started sometime between 7:00 and 8:00 p.m. on a Saturday night, and the juke box plays as long as people are awake. There’s lots of opportunity for dancing, and anyone is welcome to take a turn at the pole, as well. A buffet supper is set out once the party gets going – excellent food, and plenty of it, traditional Irish corned beef and cabbage for St. Patrick’s Day, for example.

Splitting off in pairs or foursomes or more-somes may get started after 10:00 or 11:00. The only end-point for play is governed by whether the bungalow you’re playing in is reserved for a couple to spend the night – they’ll probably want you out of their space when they’re ready to sleep.

The morning-after party might get going between 9:00 and 10:00 a.m., with coffee and always a generous home-cooked brunch. Guests may lounge, play, use the pool or hot tub, dance some more, or just gather and chat, and the party will ultimately break up by mid-afternoon on Sunday.

Typical attendance at parties is anywhere from fifteen to twenty-five couples. Single women are welcomed, and select single men may attend by invitation only. There do appear to be a number of “regulars” who are often in attendance, but don’t let that put you off. This club is the polar opposite of cliquey. Both the hosts and the regulars go out of their way to help newcomers feel welcomed. The ambience is one of acceptance, and party-goers of a wide range of ages and body types enjoy the special benefits of friendship that come with being in the lifestyle. If you’ve never had a swing club experience, JJ’s Western Swing is a comfortable, relaxing and welcoming venue to get your toes wet.

If you go:

Reservations: Check out their website at http://www.jjwesternswing.com/ for information on upcoming parties, and be sure to make a reservation. Parties are typically held monthly or more frequently, depending on the season. When you sign up, you’ll have an option of reserving an overnight stay and joining the morning after party – and if you didn’t reserve for overnight and change your mind after you arrive, there’ll probably be a way to make that work. If you’re an SLS member, you have the option of putting a JJ’s party icon on your profile and checking the list of who else is attending from SLS.

Cost: There is no standard cost to attend the party. Instead, party donations are used to offset the cost of hosting, and a portion of the donation is given to a local charity working with victims of abuse. Most couples who stay overnight and attend the brunch average about a thirty dollar donation. As with many swing clubs, drink set-ups are included, but party-goers are responsible to bring their own alcohol.

Location: The town of Pahrump is about sixty miles from the Las Vegas strip, a mostly easy drive over a well-maintained highway (Nevada State Rte. 160) with passing lanes in the mountainous section. The elevation at the pass is 5502 feet, so in winter months you’ll want to check for weather conditions if it’s raining in the valley, because it can snow at the pass. The address and complete directions are available at the club WEBSITE.

Stay Sexy – Really??

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How do you stay sexy when you’re dog tired? I shouldn’t complain – my exhaustion stems from a good thing (I hope). We’re in the throes of putting our house on the market so we can resume our full time travels in our motorhome. We’ve signed with an agent, she gave us a “to do” list and we’ve been busting our butts sorting and tossing and packing and selling and de-cluttering and spackling and painting and carrying and…

And, the last thing on my mind, most of the time most days, is staying sexy. There. I said it. I flunked!

I know what I would tell anyone else in this spot – perspective, and balance.

Perspective means remembering that for the last five glorious months we got a chance to taste what our future will be once we’ve emptied the house and downsized our belongings. We spent November through March living simply in our house on wheels and traveling to follow our interests and our climate of choice. It’s kind of like having dessert first – now we’ve got to eat our vegetables (which is silly, really, since I like vegetables). But keeping my focus fixed on what those five months felt like helps me tolerate what feels like a seismic shift in our daily life.

Perspective also means realizing the current state of our life is temporary. Hubs has long been fond of the saying this too will pass. We won’t be pushed like this forever. Actually, the agent will come take photos Monday and will bring other agents to tour the house on Wednesday, so the rush of intense preparation to showcase the house will in fact be done in three more days.

Balance is actually even harder for me than keeping perspective. Balance means I’ve got to stop and replenish often enough that I don’t let myself get dog tired in the first place. Running ourselves into the ground compromises our immune systems, makes us more prone to illness, and in general depletes our health and our resources. I’ll get nothing done if I’m sick. Several times a day I need to stop and breathe, stretch, read, relax, maybe even take a power nap. Haven’t been following those instructions very well, but I’m hoping that fessing up on these pages and writing about it will help me do better down the home stretch.

I’d love to hear from you – how do YOU stay vibrant, healthy, excited and sexy when the pressure’s on?

A Sexy Workout Fave

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Here’s one for all you baby boomers out there. I was thrilled in 2012 to shed those final few pounds and reach the weight I enjoyed in my twenties, pre-pregnancy. Did I mention said son is now over thirty? So it’s been a while, and as any baby boomer will tell you, it’s not arranged in quite the same way, even though I’ve never not worked out. I have wonderfully strong abs, snazzy legs – and love handles at my waist, in spite of everything.

But I found the perfect move to whip them into shape, courtesy of Beyonce and Women’s Health Magazine: Side planks with knee tuck twist. Caveat – I am not a trainer, so if you want to do this move, go to the Workout Link and do exactly as they say! Essentially, the move is a side plank, upper arm bent at the elbow with hand on head, in which the lower leg comes forward in a knee tuck while the torso and upper arm bend so the elbow reaches toward the moving knee. Got that? Look it up :)! According to the instructions I read, Beyonce does ten reps on each side, three sets.

I lay on the floor on my side as instructed, bent my lower arm at the elbow and placed that forearm on the floor, raised my torso until my weight was only supported by my forearm and my feet – and promptly rolled forward, falling out of the plank. This, in spite of years of regular cardio workouts and occasional yoga. Definitely some muscles in need of a new workout!

So the first hurdle was strength and balance. Needless to say, once I got the balance thing figured out, adding the knee tuck (never mind the torso bend!) immediately rolled me forward flat on the floor again. Or sometimes, backwards. Three sets of ten reps? Not gonna happen.

Start small is my main motto – and truly, that is what I did. My first day, just getting one rep accomplished on each side was a major miracle. I wisely skipped the next day. Day three – still just one on each side. Day five I was finally able to bump it up to two. And so it went, a little more each day, until I could crank out a full ten reps on each side without falling out of the plank.

Am I there yet? Way improved – and in any case, it’s a process. But when I put on my low-rise jeans, that irritating roll of flab over the belt is missing, so I’m happy, and that’s motivation to keep at it.

One more thing: Did you notice my main motivation for adding this routine to my workout was vanity? Guess what – it doesn’t matter what it takes to get you started on something that’s good for you. Turns out this routine has fabulous payoff in the bedroom! It works your obliques and strengthens your core, so you’ll experience improved stamina, not to mention better Kegel squeeze power. And yes, my husband noticed – he loves it. Try it out – your sex life will be glad you did.

What’s your favorite workout move? We’d love to hear about it.

Have fun – and Stay Sexy!

Stay Sexy: The sexiest thing you can ever do…

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…is get your heart rate up there!

Okay, so you already know being sexy probably has to involve our hearts – we want to be sexy with the person we give our heart to, right? And after all, this week is Valentine’s Day, so talking about our hearts is a natural.

But here’s the thing: elevating our heart rate into that aerobic target zone, even a little bit, does something magical for both our bodies and our brains. Turns out it helps us be both more desirable and more interested in being sexy!

Body-wise, it helps us burn fat (and, if you saw our Stay Sexy column last week, you know having sex burns as many calories as lots of other forms of exercise). Plus, there’s more, according to the Mayo Clinic. It makes our metabolism more efficient. It’ll improve our stamina, in case we’re aiming for a marathon session. It reduces pain – maybe that’s why my migraine episodes decreased as my workouts increased. I’ll take it! It revs up our immune system, reducing our likelihood of getting sick. And, naturally, it’s good for our hearts. It strengthens the heart muscles and helps clear out our arteries by boosting our HDL cholesterol (the good kind).

Did that list sound sexy? Not so much, by itself – but even just sticking with what it does for the body, I’ll look better, feel better and live longer, and that’s sexy.

The brain magic is even more impressive – and less well known. According to Dr. John Ratey, in Spark, spending time in our target heart rate zone decreases depression, reduces anxiety, relieves stress, decreases dementia in later life, and even increases our brain capacity. Personally, I think that’s very sexy – I’ll be happier, more relaxed, smarter, and possibly even more inventive!

I hope this list of benefits has piqued your curiosity – I’d love to answer questions about how all this works (see, I told you it makes us smarter 🙂 ). Stay tuned – in future Stay Sexy columns, we’ll be sharing more personally about the impact this information has had for both my husband and myself.

In the meantime – Happy Valentine’s Day, have fun, and stay sexy!