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Posts Tagged ‘Sex Positivity’

What do We Tweet? #Health #Boomers #Pride #Polyamory #SexPositivity

What do We Tweet?

#Health #Boomers #Pride #Polyamory #SexPositivity

Are you getting the drift? My husband and I write erotic romance together under our pen name, Adriana Kraft. Yes, we are Baby Boomers working hard to stay healthy. Yes, we support Pride, polyamory, and sex positivity. I’ll start from the back of the list.

Here’s what sex positivity means to us (with a shout out to Charlie Glickman, who we think offers the clearest definition): There are three criteria for judging any sexual encounter among adults:

One: consent of all involved parties, at every step of the process.

Two: Pleasure for the involved parties (however they define pleasure).

Three: it contributes to the well-being of the involved parties.

For us, this means things like no slut shaming, such as we encountered in some reviews of our erotic romance The Best Man. Yes, Kitty (our heroine) is a slut. Is that wrong? No. Does it bring her pleasure and contribute to her well-being? Sometimes – and when it doesn’t, those consequences force her to grow and figure out what she really wants. We think that stands for itself. A good read on this topic is The Ethical Slut, by Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton.

Working backwards: Polyamory (and multiple partners, whether or not all parties are in love) follows logically from sex positivity. None of us can dictate who will fall in love or even who “ought” to fall in love. Perhaps the most important line in our bio is “we believe in happy endings for all who fall in love, whatever their gender, sexual orientation or numerical combination.” We write fictional stories that adhere to these values, and those are also the values we apply in real life. Tristan Taormino has written a thoughtful book about polyamory that we highly recommend: Opening Up

Pride. Not just because we believe it is right and that it follows logically from the above values, but because both our extended family and our friendship network are filled with gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered individuals, all of whom we love deeply and believe deserve happiness and fulfillment in love.

Boomers – that cohort born between 1946 and 1964. This year, Baby Boomers are between the ages of 53 and 71, and no, we’re not among the youngest of those. Our stories often feature main characters who are in their fifties and beyond, though we also love writing younger characters. True love and satisfying erotic encounters can happen at any age and are always to be celebrated, including in erotic romance. Joan Price, an advocate for ageless sexuality, has a delightful collection of erotic stories entitled Ageless Erotica.

Health, without which none of the above would be possible. Maintaining health becomes increasingly challenging as we age, and it is our most important value. We work out. We read up on brain health, nutrition, strength training, aerobic exercise, and stress reduction. We incorporate as much of this information as we can into our daily routines, and we are each other’s cheerleader and workout buddy to keep ourselves on track.

If you are a blogger focused on any of these topics, we’d love to invite you to our pages. If you are a reader who shares our interests, naturally we hope you’ll check out our books at this LINK.


Sex Positivity, continued.

Every morning I troll my FaceBook “Likes” looking for posts to share with readers. Hubs and I write erotic romance together because we love it, we love great sex, and we want to be part of helping our readers not only find hot spicy reads, but expecially find joy and pleasure in their sexuality.

Two posts crossed my path this morning and they kind of go together. The first is from Life On The Swingset – a real-life swinger who is blogging about his journey in the lifestyle. He came out about his poly lifestyle to a friend, and it cost him the friendship. Here’s the blog LINK. Go like his Facebook Page, if you’re looking for a window into the poly lifestyle.

The very next post in my feed was from The Pleasure Coach (another page I highly recommend you “like”) – it was the graphic below:

So I always reach back to the Sex Positivity credo (with a shout-out to sex blogger Charlie Glickman) when I run into these things: There are only three criteria for judging any sexual act.

  1. that it takes place among consenting adults
  2. that it brings pleasure to the participants
  3. that it brings no harm to anyone involved.

That’s it. Period. No judgment, no censure, no shame in someone else’s choices, as long as it meets these criteria.

So that’s my hope, on this mid-January day in 2013.

Go have some intensely erotic, normal fun!

© 2020 Adriana Kraft. All Rights Reserved.
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